This is what harmony look like in your relationships:
• Harmony as a process
• Shared Goals & Community
• Imperfections & Oppositions
I think I might have found the key to harmonious relationships. All it takes is going through a nightmare hellscape of family trauma, child and previous occurences of domestic abuse, moving 7 hrs from blood relations and loose friendships to find the coven of women who have also touched darkness and refused to be cowed by it. THOSE women are where you get your harmony itch scratched. Not with a partner, which is how it was always marketed to us, but with souls who see you and understand everything about you, and what they don't understand they offer grace and compassion to. They don't ask pointless and ineffective rheotrical questions because they can't filter what they say. They don't even offer suggestions immediately. What they do is listen, wait their turn, and then share their feelings on the matter. never to sway or cajole, but genuinely provide their perspective on the matter, to give you more information to connect important dots in your healing.
This answer may reflect my marriage more closely than i would feel comfortable with, were it not for our first couples therapy scheduled in 12 minutes time from now. Despite the heavy feeling on sensure and anger at things left unsaid as they die on my tounge, what i mean to convey is that partner's can't be all things to one person. How does that give them space to breathe and feel and grow.
The best part of my late 30s (so far) has been understanding and clocking the lies we've been forced to believe are comandments. Villages don't just cease being helpful once babies can walk. Humans need their village for life. So find your village, your coven, your family. And you'll find your harmony. And until that happens, offer this phrase for your partner to use when you're in state and require gentle comfort:
Are you alright?
Have you had enough sunlight?
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Walking away.
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A breath for a moment to see the good and kindness amidst the chaos. A brief reminder that the evil we perceive is less based in reality than we believe.
• •
Are you alright? Have you had enough sunlight?
HARMONY AS A PROCESS
Same beliefs, compassion, unwavering support and passion
•
Presence
•
It all erodes to symmetry… and forgets the malignancy of sharp notes in harsh voices.
IMPERFECTIONS & OPPOSITIONS
Maybe the harmony is just in looking for it. Maybe it's commitment to finding it together. I can't make harmony for myself on my own, or for you with me — we meed to make it together.
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Feeling like we are on the same team trying to reach the same goals.
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My baby's first words were "no, no, no". Wagging her finger at the dogs. That tiny tiny pointer finger. I have never felt the mirror of life held up against me so strongly and so painfully. Moments of interspecies harmony in his home are fleeting and elusive and perhaps all I can ask for at this stage is peaceful co-existence.
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Harmony in my relationships looks like peace and balance. It looks like giving and also receiving. It feels loving, supported and freeing.
• •
All I can ask for at this stage is peaceful co-existence.
IMPERFECTIONS & OPPOSITIONS
All dissonance collapses into harmony
One note into polyphony
given time
Its names are sung in distant matrimony
Opulence picked from parsimony
given time
Everything lost to sanctimony
gives way to sanctuary
given time
If it ends in peace or ignominy
or if chance delivers parity
given time
Then it all erodes to symmetry
and forgets the malignancy
of sharp notes
in harsh voices
because elsewhere,
they call it entropy
• •
Find your coven… your village… and you’ll find your harmony.
SHARED GOALS & COMMUNITY
Not sure true harmony in its true definition is actually achievable - friends, lovers, parents, co-works … we are human who ebb and flow minute by minute. The kingdom is broken up by power - sometimes you have it, sometimes you don’t, whether you agree or not. Want it or not relationships are divided. Sometimes it’s 60/40 sometimes less or more but so rarely are we 50/50.
• •
In sync isn’t being the same. It’s being in rhythm.
HARMONY AS A PROCESS
In sync
isn’t being the same
It’s being in rhythm,
my exhale to your inhalation
Chords of your neck
Against the softness of my cheek and chin
the sweet smell of sap, rising.
Making love
Is a collision of opposites
When fit is everything
And flow is energy
Head to toe,
Electric.
Shocking this incongruent ecstasy
at seventy
All this to say
it does get better.
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There would be no need to prove yourself, instead be rewarded for who you are.
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I think harmony is probably found in balance...so it would mean relationships where I find a healthy opposition to my beliefs, actions, self. But all together, in my many relationships, I'd want that opposition to look different in each one, so I am able to be expansive enough to open into harmonic opposition with a greater number of people.
• •
THIS MONTH'S PROMPT
THIS MONTH'S PROMPT
This month’s full moon in Scorpio has us cutting deep and to the point. We’re playing emotional mad libs.